I can't believe you two!
by Winchester-Colt
Summary: Oneshot. Harry finally gets to the bottom of what has been going on between the Winchester brothers. Now fed up, an epic Harry blow-up ensues and both Winchesters end up losing. K for mild language/Harry ownage.
1. The owning of Sam and Dean

This is a One-shot that contains a world-class Harry melt-down. I always loved it when Harry finally goes off on the people that have wronged him. Dumbledore, Ron and Hermione, the Ministry, don't matter. When he's ticked, He takes no prisoners! IT'S AWESOME!

This is set in early season 5 of Supernatural, and much after book 7 of HP. Harry would be about Sam's age, if not a year or so older.

**A/N: 9/23/10:** I was asked if I would add a chapter or two onto this by my Cuz as well as a few reveiwers, But I already have two stories in the works. "Demon King Daddy" and "Little Sister" come first. For now, this is a one-shot. After those are done, we'll see. After I finish one or both of them I might concider adding on to this story.

Enjoy!

* * *

Harry opened the door to the hotel room while balancing the fast food bags and drinks carefully on his arms as he walked in... Only to be greeted by the oddest, yet most common place sight that he had witnessed in the past few weeks.

Sam and Dean Winchester, fighting one another...

Well, beating the shit out of one another, actually.

Harry walked in just as Dean slammed his fist into Sam's chest. Sam went down, hard, and with a resounding BOOM. But he didn't even bother wasting time with getting his footing back. He really didn't have time, as Dean had started to rush at him yet again. Sam just hulled back both of his legs, and kicked Dean full-force in the gut. That sent Dean flying across the room... Litterly. Harry was sure he would have gone further, but the wall at the end of the hotel room halted his flight quite abruptly. Another BOOM echoed through the room, this one on a more hollow note.

"HEY, HEY, HEY! STOP IT! STOP IT!" Harry said as he franticly scrambled to put the drinks and food on the nightstand, then jumped inbetween the two fraying brothers. Putting both of his arms out, as if to block them. Luckily he got in the middle just before they got their bearings back. For Sam that meant before he got back on his feet. For Dean then meant before he got the wind back in his lungs.

"WHAT IN THE BLOODY HELL IS GOING ON? Why are you two fighting like this?" Harry yelled, eyeing the brothers both in turn. Watching both to make sure they didn't jump back at each other. Sam was still on the floor (now sitting up) and Dean's back was resting heavily against the wall.

They both had seemed to calm down after Harry jumped between them, but then the two brothers met one anothers' eyes. The two glared with such rage and intensity that Harry felt like he was being stabbed by daggers just by standing inbetween them. He flinched and fought the urge to jump out of the way.. Because he knew if he did, they would go right back to whailing on one another.

"Look.. Brothers having a brawl once and awhile, I get it.. A few times, maybe if we've had a bad go of it… but EVERY-BLOODY-DAY? TWO OR THREE BLOODY TIMES? YOU TWO ARE CONSTANTLY AT ONE ANOTHER'S THROATS!" They both looked shamed at the British man's words, and starting to pull themselves together.. Dean seemed to get up first, But Sam wasn't to far behind. Harry would call that a draw.

"So now.. Are you two going to tell me WHAT IN THE BLOOD HELL IS GOING ON? Because quite franky, I'm getting sick of this..."

Sam's face was always expressive. Harry could count the amount of times he seen Sam angry on one hand. But his expression now was in-between "inhumanly pissed" and "total rage." Dean, on the other hand, was much harder to read. If it wasn't for his eyes being as intense as Sam's, his jaw was locked in place, his knuckles not only turning white, but seeming to be nearing black and blue, he wouldn't of known he was that pissed.

Harry wanted to get out of the way… Chills ran down his back and his hands started shaking from being in the middle of these two intense Hunters… But he couldn't move.. He wouldn't let them back at one another.. God, he was pathetic. Two bloody muggles were about to send him screaming like a little girl out the door!

The tension in the room didn't fade, but it did seem to condense down as the seconds passed. It was then that the silent war between the brothers calmed enough for one of them to talk. Or Dean just couldn't keep his mouth shut anymore… whichever.

"You need to choose..." Dean then growled deeply, as he put a hand over his ribs. It seemed he was still a bit winded. Harry raised an eyebrow. Wait a second, was Dean talking to Sam, or?..

"Which one of us do you want, Harry?.. That obsessive JERK, or me?.." Sam then breathed out.. Harry's eyes widened as he stared at Sam in shock. WHAT THE HELL? Is that what this was about?

"Wait.. What.. _ME!"_ Harry stammered out.

"YES, _YOU!" _Dean burst out, then turning back to burn a hole through Sam. "Me, or that blood addicted BITCH over there! Which one of us do you want?..." Sam's neck craned as murder burned brightly in his eyes. It seemed that Dean had said the wrong thing.. yet again..

A light bulb turned on in Harry's head…

Dean, giving him the extra 'hands on' gun lessons… Sam, asking him to help research with him on the sofa, sitting closer then he normally would. Dean, having him sitting up in the front seat in the Impala right next to him. Sam, booking two rooms, making sure Dean was by himself…

"Oh, you two have got to be bloody KIDDING ME!" Harry now screamed. Suddenly, he felt just as pissed as the Winchesters.

"You Bloody fools had been fighting.. Arguing.. BEATING the BLOODY SHIT out of one another… Because of ME?"

Sam and Dean both froze and stared blankly at Harry.

"ME? Honestly?... ME?" Harry screamed as Dean and Sam both stared at him dumbly. Harry's angery thoughts then suddenly turned into sharp knifes in the form of words. Before he could even stop himself, his mouth opened and they shot out.

"You know, if I remember correctly you two weren't even on the best of terms BEFORE I came along.."

Harry then turned to Dean, and pointed a finger at him. "YOU had just gotten back from hell and saw Demons when you where awake, asleep, and indifferent! You kept yourself so DRUNK that you where almost completly desensitized! ALL-OF-THE-FLIPPING TIME… Even during hunts!"

Harry then turned and pointed to Sammy. "YOU, dear Sammy, where actully up to your ears in demons. Both it killing them, exorcizing them, drinking them, and OH YEAH! _Fucking_ one, too… You had been ignoring Ellen, Jo, And Bobby… You shut them completly out of your life... And when Dean came back, you shut him out to! You could have told them everything... You could let them all help you, but NO… You didn't!"

"And now you two are bickering over ME? **ME!** A 115-pound wizarding world REJECT? AND while I've got BOTH of your _BLOODY ATTENTIONS!_"

It was then that Harry turned back to Dean. His face now furious, as he walked right up the hunter, and prodded him harshly in his (sore) ribs..

"YOU, you _bloody, shameless_ GIT! You DID Have me! We dated for WEEKS.. **WEEKS** Before you dropped me like a hot caldron! And why? You where SOOO afraid that Sammy or Bobby would find out that you where SHAGGING a GUY, you just took off! No calls, no letters, no goodbye, and thus far, NO APOLOGLY! You where just GONE.. If it wasn't for Cas finding me and asking for my help, you would have never given me a second thought!"

Harry then turned around, leaving the guilty looking hunter behind him as he stalked over to Sam.. The anger in his eyes still alit. Harry then jabbed his finger at Sam, who was blinking rapidly in shock.

"AND YOU! YOU DON'T EVEN REALLY WANT TO DATE ME!" Harry raged.. And got back a confused and startled look in return. "You just KILLED Ruby! RUBY? Remember her? The codependent demonic bitch? The manipulative whore that isolated you from everyone else in your life? Betrayed you? USED you? Here, let me spell this out to you, load and clear.. **REBOUNDING! **You're **REBOUNDING**! You're not ready for another relationship! You've still got open wounds from your last one! And I refuse to play second fiddle to a dead lover! Let alone a dead _Demon_ lover!"

Harry then turned around and grabbed his bags, growling at himself as he started tossing his stuff back into them.

"So.. You guys want to me to choose between the two of you?" Harry said and he stuffed the last shirt in the bag, and forcfully zipped it up. Flicking his wand at his other bag to pack it up.

"Pick one, over the other, right?" Harry remarked coldly as he tossed the pack over his shoulder, then went to the door and flung it open.

"Well, then.. Here's my answer to you two..."

Harry then turned and looked at both the Winchesters.. the shock-and-awe look on their faces, and the shame in their eyes. Both holding their breaths for Harry's answer.

"You can both go _fuck yourselfves._"

And with that, Harry walked out and slammed the door shut. On them both.


	2. RIP WC

Winchester-Colt, Also known Cynthia Gutierrez, Passed away today due to sudden Heart failure...

She and her stories will be missed, And i'm sorry to bring this news to you.

If anyone wishes to use her story ideas, i'm sure she would have loved it.

~A Friend of the Family.


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